Invisible

This weekend, I joined a training about cultivating compassion held by the Compassion Institute at the Gyuto Monastery in Richmond. The workshop was taught by Margaret Cullen and Thupten Jinpa, principal English translator for the Dalai Lama (lightly fangirled Jinpa for his proximity to HHDL).

We kicked off the day with a guided visualization recalling an experience where we received or showed compassion. With my eyes closed, I remembered sitting in my bed just two weeks ago, sobbing. I recalled the feelings of hurt from my mom's painful words that I had failed at my marriage. I called my sister on Facetime. She picked up and saw that I was crying and immediately went into another room, shut the door, and looked into the video with a quiet attention. I told her what happened with our mom. She listened carefully, patiently, and with genuine concern on her face. She let me finish sharing all my thoughts and feelings. Once I finished, she paused and gave silence as she absorbed my words. She looked into the video and said, I'm sorry that mom's words caused you suffering. 

 The exercise asked us to break into pairs to reflect on the experience we recalled and share specifically what we noticed about that moment of compassion.

I told my exercise partner, In that moment with my sister, I could feel warmth in my body. My heart rate slowed down as I noticed her attention. I felt deeply loved, listened to, safe, and seen. 

 My partner asked a great question after I shared my reflection.

 What keeps us from seeing each other clearly? What keeps us invisible to each other? 

 The teachers shared these dimensions of compassion:
  • Attention 
  • Listening
  • Engagement 
  • Involvement
  • Helping 
  • Presence
  • Understanding 
What stands in the way of these dimensions? What barriers do we experience in seeing ourselves and each other clearly everyday? 


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