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Showing posts from March, 2020

Get Naked With Coronavirus

Get naked with coronavirus.  By get naked, I mean, get quiet, get bored, get sad, get angry, get confused, get relaxed, get rest, get restless, get thankful, get scared, get whatever it is that our inner world is asking of us right now. Get naked with yourself. Get exposed to yourself.  This exercise might be more difficult for those who have care taking duties. But this is an opportunity nevertheless to really be there for ourselves and our loved ones in a way that we were never invited to do before. This moment of pause in our "normal" lives as we know is historic for the world. Such a moment may frighten many of us who might not be used to this amount of time on our hands or used to this unprecedented barrier to busy-ing our lives in the way that both our evolutionary instincts and American culture socializes us to do. BUT, this is a tremendous chance for us to take stock in what's most important to us, to find gratitude for our lives literally, and to simply get q

Am I Ready to Die?

Am I ready to die? Am I ready to die alone?  I spent all day contemplating these questions. They're not questions we're forced to think about often, as young people or as Americans. But given the state of this pandemic, many of us, maybe for the first time ever, are confronting this possible reality. Maybe though, despite the grave circumstance, some of us are not yet allowing ourselves to really consider this reality. Because frankly, the thought of dying, regardless of our age, is absolutely terrifying. And to die alone, wow. Who could blame this fear of ours though? Our American view of death is one of deep aversion. It's not something we talk openly about, embrace, celebrate, nor prepare for. It's something we avoid and run away from. Am I ready to die? Am I ready to die alone?  While I haven't asked myself these questions explicitly before coronavirus, over the past few months, I have been in deep contemplation about many other aspects of death. Am I sc

A Year of Dana

Last October, I went to a powerfully intuitive reiki practitioner, looking for a cleanse and realignment of the energy centers in my body. I needed her help to deal with my divorce grief. I had no idea what to expect, but walked away feeling upright, lighter, and energetic. Days after my second reiki, while sitting in meditation, I experienced an intimate moment of gratitude for someone I love deeply. Within minutes, I felt a rush of clarity and energy in my body. Just like that, the idea of living A Year of Dana came to me. After a few months of feeling the continuous energy of this idea in my heart and body, I finally decided to give notice to my employer. I am leaving my job of five years on April 3, 2020. Over the next year, I will be living A Year of Dana , focused on the practice of generosity towards myself and others. I will practice generosity through cultivating a heartset and mindset of abundance and dismantling my own mental conditioning around scarcity. My h

Invisible

This weekend, I joined a training about cultivating compassion held by the Compassion Institute  at the Gyuto Monastery in Richmond. The workshop was taught by Margaret Cullen and Thupten Jinpa, principal English translator for the Dalai Lama (lightly fangirled Jinpa for his proximity to HHDL). We kicked off the day with a guided visualization recalling an experience where we received or showed compassion. With my eyes closed, I remembered sitting in my bed just two weeks ago, sobbing. I recalled the feelings of hurt from my mom's painful words that I had failed at my marriage. I called my sister on Facetime. She picked up and saw that I was crying and immediately went into another room, shut the door, and looked into the video with a quiet attention. I told her what happened with our mom. She listened carefully, patiently, and with genuine concern on her face. She let me finish sharing all my thoughts and feelings. Once I finished, she paused and gave silence as she absorbed my